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Friday, October 2, 2009

Hey, go milk the dogs

Ever notice that every dog on this island has teats like a cow? I was watching a "cow dog" the other day and came up with a brilliant entrepreneurial idea. Okay, Saipan has an excess of dogs, right? Well-- instead of collecting and euthanizing them, let's make a dog dairy. And... because I don't think dog milk will sell well, lets make cheese from the dog milk. We'll need to give it some exotic European name so people won't associate it with Saipan boonie dogs.... (you know like "Pecorino Romano" is from sheep milk). Then we sell it all over Asia in teeny tiny expensive packages. Well... except most Asians don't eat cheese-- but they do like trendy things in Japan. We need to make dog cheese a hip and trendy new food. (Oh, according to the web, the French word for a female dog looks like a good cheese name... "Chienne")

Well, except my kids are refusing to milk boonie dogs for me, because they think I'm nuts. (no argument here). Oh well, yet another brilliant idea of mine tossed on the scrap heap.

Thirty some years ago, I had the brilliant idea to sell water in soda vending machines cause I don't like sugary drinks... .someone stole that idea, and made gobs of money. If anyone steals this idea and makes gobs of money, I'm calling my attorney. (I'll also pass out from astonishment.)

OK, um... GROSS!! Dog cheese?? I'M KIDDING!! Please, kids, don't try this at home.